Home cash game nl holdem..?

well this night was definitely one to forget but there was a few hands i think i could learn a lot from like one with a straight vs the old runner runner flush: i limped pre-flop with 8 6 as it was short handed and everyone was limping, plus its pretty fishy so mediocre hands will pay you off, and i flopped an open ender and bet, get raised pretty substantially and everyone folds, so i call. turn puts a second spade on the board, however, gives me the nuts. i bet about the pot size as i was pretty sure this guy has two pair or better and was hoping he would feel weakness and raise....nope, he just calls and sure enough a third spade peels off....concisely, i bet he raises and i just call watching a 2000 dollar head towards him, is there anything there i could get out of that or was that fish at their best? and what makes the hand more confusing was he did not even have a pair, just a j high in spades.... lessons? one last hand....i get aces, yet there is a raise a two callers before me....perfect right? not really. i re-raise to about 150, kinda an irritation raise as the pot is about 180 before that.....so everyone folds except one person that i am fairly familiar with and before he called pre-flop he said it was a bad call....so instantly all pairs are canceled and im thinking suited long distant connectors, like 9 5 or so....flop is j 9 2 two clubs....and he checks....i just went all in as i figured if it did hit him, he was on a draw, maybe a pair and a flush it was pretty even...basically wanted to push him off. (sets are out of my range with him putting in the pre-flop statement) and he sits there forever, contemplating and im thinking oh **** he has j 9 which would be an ok call preflop as that is aces buster but after a while he calls flips over j 2 in spades. so i understand the push isn't necessarily a good play but how in the world is it justified in calling a three bet with j 2 out of position? say the flop gives him trips...2 2 x im out of there hence the preflop discussion....say its j j x, im at least slowing down and not paying him off so two pair is really all he can hit there and win a big pot not mentioning if an ace comes out he is absolutely dead...tips?